good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
NoShamevember. You game?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
