Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
