I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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