Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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