I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
