who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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