Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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