'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
