I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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