I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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