But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
