That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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