So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
