is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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