oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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