at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks