Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/

(973): View more from New Jersey

Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.

(859): View more from Kentucky

Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?

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(859): I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/ (973): Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room. (859): Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan? http://tfl.nu/hrwu

Replies (15) Good night (959) Bad night (1328)
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(616): View more from Michigan

If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.

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(616): If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet. http://tfl.nu/k138

Replies (12) Good night (961) Bad night (2171)
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(949): View more from California

...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail

(949): View more from California

ps not my toothbrush awkward.

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(949): ...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail (949): ps not my toothbrush awkward. http://tfl.nu/7ox1

Replies (2) Good night (722) Bad night (2042)
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(410): View more from Maryland

can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd

(443): View more from Maryland

wasted?

(410): View more from Maryland

im pocohantasssss

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(410): can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd (443): wasted? (410): im pocohantasssss http://tfl.nu/gql6

Replies (109) Good night (44682) Bad night (2392)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country

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(304): She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country http://tfl.nu/39z8

Replies (16) Good night (4895) Bad night (903)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had

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(902): you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had http://tfl.nu/lpp3

Replies (9) Good night (3441) Bad night (779)
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(716): View more from New York

I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.

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(716): I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together. http://tfl.nu/l7kg

Replies (34) Good night (3238) Bad night (9999)
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(256): View more from Alabama

I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.

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(256): I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far. http://tfl.nu/ba65

Replies (6) Good night (3824) Bad night (806)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.

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(605): We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor. http://tfl.nu/zlq5

Replies (3) Good night (2550) Bad night (747)
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(823): View more from

Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?

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(823): Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning? http://tfl.nu/98fh

Replies (5) Good night (1120) Bad night (681)
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(323): View more from California

He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible

(310): View more from California

well did you say yes?

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(323): He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible (310): well did you say yes? http://tfl.nu/94vg

Replies (9) Good night (2373) Bad night (1592)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...

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(501): After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well... http://tfl.nu/7bm0

Replies (3) Good night (879) Bad night (890)
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(406): View more from Montana

He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.

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(406): He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame. http://tfl.nu/fkng

Replies (8) Good night (661) Bad night (1181)
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(253): View more from Washington

I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.

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(253): I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise. http://tfl.nu/nmya

Replies (1) Good night (396) Bad night (290)
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(626): View more from California

i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?

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(626): i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning? http://tfl.nu/2863

Replies (2) Good night (800) Bad night (291)

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