Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before

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  (404): i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before http://tfl.nu/o5nm
  Replies (29) Good night (4668) Bad night (1044)
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  (914): View more from New York

  how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes

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  (914): how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes http://tfl.nu/ebav
  Replies (38) Good night (5647) Bad night (878)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"

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  (816): She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore" http://tfl.nu/r6vm
  Replies (71) Good night (8388) Bad night (968)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.

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  (717): i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does. http://tfl.nu/p0z8
  Replies (14) Good night (1772) Bad night (3430)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?

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  (615): Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER? http://tfl.nu/yz8w
  Replies (14) Good night (5477) Bad night (1178)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?

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  (602): Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now? http://tfl.nu/lkox
  Replies (9) Good night (5471) Bad night (812)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  How sober do you have to be to donate blood?

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  (979): How sober do you have to be to donate blood? http://tfl.nu/9d8c
  Replies (9) Good night (3526) Bad night (1058)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.

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  (641): Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird. http://tfl.nu/ck05
  Replies (4) Good night (2103) Bad night (1532)
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  (916): View more from California

  you want your laptop back?

  (1-916): View more from California

  are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?

  (916): View more from California

  both.

  (1-916): View more from California

  come over.

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  (916): you want your laptop back? (1-916): are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex? (916): both. (1-916): come over. http://tfl.nu/ikpf
  Replies (6) Good night (3368) Bad night (764)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend

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  (208): I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend http://tfl.nu/wdl5
  Replies (13) Good night (3295) Bad night (673)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.

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  (601): It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face. http://tfl.nu/wypl
  Replies (9) Good night (3135) Bad night (708)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...

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  (321): I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward... http://tfl.nu/s7n4
  Replies (9) Good night (1237) Bad night (475)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!

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  (336): dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems! http://tfl.nu/qsei
  Replies (4) Good night (803) Bad night (405)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING

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  (504): You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING http://tfl.nu/6ru3
  Replies (4) Good night (780) Bad night (243)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  YES. ALL MY YES.

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  (513): I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries. (1-513): YES. ALL MY YES. http://tfl.nu/gvep
  Replies (0) Good night (609) Bad night (219)

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