Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
