you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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