No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
