It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
