I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
He felt like a one man threesome
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize