I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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