I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize