Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize