just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
