It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize