I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
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I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
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He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions