What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
