I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Last time i carry you out of a forest
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
