Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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