Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
