My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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