He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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