no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
