He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
