the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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