belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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