im gay
i know
yea but for you.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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