he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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