If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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