Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
