i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.