hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
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He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
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Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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