im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Randomize
