a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
