I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
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