forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
you will always have a special place in my vag
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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