my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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