party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
