You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
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You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
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I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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