I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
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